A Guide To Redwall Mary Sue
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Parents of Mary Sue
Mary Sue can be the child of just about anybeast, but here are the most common
"host families" for the Suvian parasite. Redwall Abbey now has a separate
infirmary section for those females found to be carrying Mary Sue or Marty Stu
babies. Even vermin mothers are taken in - the curse of the Sue affects all. The
infant is exorcised into normality at birth, or on occasion put out of its
misery if the rot has spread too deep, and the parents are given therapy.
However, they cannot catch every one, so Mary Sues still abound. Beware.
~Missing parent figures~
Often Mary Sue will be an orphan. Her parents were killed by the villain, or in
an accident, or Mother died in childbirth, or by any one of a million methods.
This is basically a milking machine for angst, and we are "treated" to endless
whines from Mary Sue. We try to ignore this and concentrate on the real
storyline. Sadly, we often find that there isn't one. Of course, Mary Sue finds
comfort in some random male victim, whom she adopts as a "big brother" figure.
This wouldn't be so bad, except they then end up as a couple by about the fifth
chapter. Several people leave, no longer able to take the semi-incestuous plot,
or rather lack of plot.
~Abbey Warrior~
Mary Sue Classic and Warrior Sue are sometimes the daughter of the Abbey Warrior
or Warrioress. They will always have their parent's amazing skill with the Sword
of Martin, with genius and good looks to boot. They are always the first
creature visited by Martin when danger strikes. They also have "Pettigrew
Spotter's Syndrome". (This is a phrase I just invented, and I don't expect it'll
catch on, but I like it. In the Harry Potter fandom, Sues in the "Moony,
Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs" era always mistrust Peter Pettigrew for no
apparent reason. Thus, Pettigrew Spotter's Syndrome.) If a vermin or strange
creature shows up at the Abbey, everybeast trusts him/her except Mary Sue. She
will be right, as this creature will steal the Sword/steal the tapestry/murder
somebeast/etc. Sort of like Dingeye and Thura, except this creature meant to do
it. This tends to prompt a Generic Redwall plotline. Or a strange creature shows
up at the Abbey and everybeast MIStrusts her except Mary Sue. This creature is
of course, a Reformed Vermin Sue. Two Sues for the price of one.
~Miscellaneous woodlander~
Some Mary Sues will be the children of random woodlanders in cute little
Sylvanian Families-style settings. Sweet. The story can start in one of two
ways. Either the community will be destroyed by vermin, leaving Mary Sue the
sole survivor a la Grath Longfletch and prompting lots of angst, or she will go
off wandering in search of adventure. So, her adorable peaceful little worldview
doesn't last long, but this is Mary Sue, so she copes surprisingly well in the
Big Wide World (TM). Normally she ends up at Redwall or Salamandastron. If she
doesn't, and sometimes that happens, then what's it doing in the Redwall
section? There's no shame in writing original fiction!
Usually, however, she will. Of course she then saves the day, gets paired with
the Abbey Warrior or whoever, blah blah blah. Pretty boring.
~Vermin leader~
If Mary Sue is a vermin, then her parents are always horde leaders or corsair
captains or something similar. Of course, Mary Sue will angst a lot because her
parents are evil and she isn't. Actual evil Sues are extremely rare, but beware,
they do exist. Mostly a vermin Sue will betray her parents to the Redwallers
"for the good of the world". Hopefully not for the reasons used in fics (and
some published works too, in fact) featuring humans, eg
"ohmygodliketheheroissohot!" Possibly for this reason, though *squick*. Mice and
weasels really should not attempt to interbreed, but it doesn't seem to stop
Mary Sue trying. Okay, I need to take a break now and wash my Inner Eye.
That's better. Anyway, Mary Sue may be found out when she betrays her parents.
Just as she is about to be executed, her woodland friends rush up and kill her
parents, saving her. Mary Sue will of course cry a lot because her parents are
dead, totally ignoring the fact that they were about to kill her. But of course,
Mary Sue is so nice she feels anguished anyway. Oh, poor Mary Sue.
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Next chapter will be about the habitats of the various breeds of Mary Sue. Abbot Mortimer is offering mass exorcisms of those places worst affected.
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Questions? Comments? Email me at wordsmith101NOSPAM@btopenworld.com (don't forget to delete the NOSPAM first).